Name: Sunday, January 13, 2008
all-in-one
/edit] i am a genius! i managed to change the settings of my blog post =DDi am like so tired i dont evn think i can blog properly.. just gon cut and paste some stuffs that i had saved in my lappy. they are not in order..
I am enjoying the bus ride home more and more each day,
Even if it is just the silence that surrounds us.
The topics we talk abt now are very much different from our first ride home.
I could remember the attic story clearly as if twas yesterday.
Now, we are really talking and pondering over more serious issues,
At least issues that i think are significant in some sense.
Busing is such and important event in my life it seems,
So many things happen on the busrides.
Fortunately, most of them are times that i am grateful for.
It's always been the same since secondary school days,
Many of the elements have changed
(i actually used the word elements!
But it really doesnt have anything to do with code =D)
but the bottom line remains..
There was nothing she could do,
She was simply rooted to her bed.
Staring blankly at the moving screen,
The events slowly unfolded right before her eyes.
Tears streamed down her tired face uncontrollably,
Her eyes felt like they weren’t hers anymore.
The pain was indescribable,
Responsibilities, society’s opinions, one’s cowardice,
All these only further magnify the excruciating wound.
It seems as if those tears were the most desperate measure,
A feeble attempt to wash away the pain and hurt.
As the memory returns to haunt,
The raw wound,
Still trickling with blood,
Torn open repeatedly.
How many times does it takes,
Before one can finally move on?
Disappointed by ppl again and again.
She just wants to go on working hard at living,
Having a reason to wake up for everyday.
Even if it is for the simplest things.
All the external factors what are not within her control,
She has decided to just let them be,
Since there is nothing she can do about it.
Except to ignore them.
She's no longer affected,
By the slightest change in attitude by anybody.
In fact, she is glad,
Of her sudden ability to stay cool,
Regardless of what happens..
She's afraid of what is happening,
Afraid that all these nasty happenings may just get her,
Get her on a bad day.
She doesnt wanna wear her emotions on her sleeves anymore,
She cant differentiate the good from the bad.
All she needs is her chocs yo!
The tension at home and in school is madness,
how long can it last?
Maybe let it drag till exam period,
It'd be good, isnt it?
Why do you wake up every morning?
Nobody ever really thought about this question..
Just because you cant sleep anymore,
Is not a good enough answer..
She's hooked on Code,
The 'raw' voice,
The heart-wrenching lyrics,
The screams,
PERFECT tearjerker..
She didnt just tear,
She cried.
She's so weak now it's a disgrace.
However vulnerable,
She insists on coping alone.
Talk about being stubborn.
As much as (Proposal Daisakusen) was about Love,
She was more envious of their friendship..
How they talked about being unable to meet up everyday like before,
How work has separated them.
Hurts.
RyoPi's friendships's sweet.
Making it seems like only natural to rely on one another,
To accompany each other through rough patches silently.
Everything seems like it is only right.
The trust that exists between them,
The mutual respect.
What more can one ask for?
She became girlier
But she didnt become happier.
She finds everything amusing now,
Especially herself.
Deep inside,
All the sarcastic sniggles for herself.
Pathetic.
The world seems so much more perfect
When she views it with ice-cold looks.
Why?
She need not be warm towards everybody
But she should never doubt others,
Or have negative impressions of others.
This will only turn her into an ugly monster..
On the other hand,
she likes the changes in her recently.
She is happier..
Or in the least she is not so sad,
To the extent that she wanna hide from the world.
Nothing beats strolling in the rain
When you're not having the best of moods.
If only it'd pour further.
The rain makes me feel so refreshed!
Paired with the dancey music,
Let's party yo!
The change in face is scary..
No one is indispensable,
Or so the OB tutor said.
In fact, darddy said the same thing before.
I hate what i see
Alot's running through this puny brain of mine,
MANY ALOTS!
There's a reason for everything
but for this post, there isnt.
Labels: many me, many posts
1:32 AM