Name: Thursday, November 15, 2007
random night posts
I tried and I still bawled like a baby. Lol. I was just feelin really sucky since the day started. Well, twas since morn yeah but I just refused to admit. Then the day just went and nothing really changed, I very much just felt numb. I cant say I was indifferent but I just really didn’t very much want to bother abt anythg. I hate feelin sucky cos I wont bother doin any work and that is an equation that will definitely result in an answer that says, screwed.Basically the whole day was very much tryin to contain my anger and of cos I knoe I wasn’t the only person bein frustrated but mayb that’s all I cared abt, I am selfish. Bein the usual me, whn I am feelin down and yucky I’d wanna cry but this time I didn’t, I tried with all my might to hold it back. Some part of me was cravin for a smoke. Must be the bad influence frm the jappo show. Hoho. Jom ppl, I’l start finding yall, namely dinny. Hahaha! Afterall, I am legal.
Yep, it’s been some time that I have stayed clean. Maybe meetin with my cjmates just made me realize maybe I shudnt just forget that at some part of my life, the growin up part, I wasn’t like who I am now. Or you can call it the bad influence but I liked it. Not like now, sometimes I don’t evn feel human-like because my emotions are all gone. They are all either replaced by negativity or emptiness. Boy, it’s not cool yo. Lol.
Kinda looking forward to scoob endin his As. He happily asked me, ‘How’s vicky?’ that a*hole mixed dinny up with his other friend, somebody we called Vicky-mama. Hoho! ‘cos they’re both hotshit nigga. That fella’s also one dude no short of laughter. Was talking to scoob abt his As results bein the hardest part of his whole As ordeal, he told me to take his results for him while he snooze at home. Right, lets see if you can really get your hairy ass down to slpin first.
OMG! Tmr’s gonna be panda eyes man…. Smore got cds. Fainted.. I finally fixed my heels, that means I can wear them. Bad mood means one shud alws dress up to try to feel better. That’s it yo and I needa wake up in less than four hours’ time to meet b for breakfast. Faints. I really don’t knoe how I survived on 3-4hours of slp everyday and the last wkend that I failed to rest is really takin a toll on me. Or maybe I am really old but fuck it =))
Labels: babybawl, bad habits, balls of fun, crave
4:20 AM