Name: Sunday, August 24, 2008
brief stopover
yep, just gon be here to announce my new LJ add then i'm gonna scoot off to update in LJ again. yesyes, i realised i am damn bloody contradictin. i moved cos i dont want ppl to read but now i am openly sayin my new add again -.- i guess some things just nv change =DDit's cos ppl like the nigger *ahem* totally doesnt knoe my new 'location', damn~ nice. hahaa! i'm LJ-ing now cos can categorized certain entries as private so i can like restrict the readers of my entry, so i feel better than way, just to satisfy my anal nature. also, the jap fans are more active at the LJ side and it is DEFINITELY more convenient, i totally cant live without my LJ communities now. hehee! tho i'd say it's so much easier postin pics on blog..
and berlinies, zee totally knoe how to access my private entry, ask her! if she doesnt rmb.. err.. i will try to rmb. hahaa! BINTAN SOOON!
after all that crap.. DOUZOU!
cigarettebutts.livejournal.com
Labels: new add
3:35 AM
Monday, June 30, 2008
adieu
i.. kinda moved =DDD movin, moved, whatever, it is somewhat similar. hoho. which is also why there is a sudden lack of entries here. i've been postin diligently to a new lj acct, cos the old one's friends list's a total mess and it's bein used as an 'open' acct for friends with no accts to view my current lj, how convenient. lol.it's understandable since most of my friends have lj and are postin at lj.. so, might as well, it is so on the way =DD
evrytime i do a move, it is a simple sign of me bein anal and not wantin ppl to read secretly. of cos there are ppl i knoe who read 'secretly' basically, they dont tag. lol. hahaa! ppl like.. *cough* potato *cough* ms. noodles *cough* LOL! if i were b, i'd say, tag first then i'l give you the new user. hehee! altho i am damn sure, with potato's ability, she can TOTALLY find my new lj, sure cant underestimate her. hahaa! but since i am not b, i dont post unglam pics of you or whatsoever but you can get the user from b, cos i just told her a few hours ago. yes, not too long ago cos i was happily only writin for my friends who are ljusers. hehee!
i am like some freekid who posts and posts. not gd, i am supposed to be studyin damn it! grrhhhh!'
Labels: moved again
3:12 AM
Saturday, June 21, 2008
every meetin has to come to an end
as it was for this event. i did manage to snap some pics in the last day and a few in the lil india day. i shud have taken more durin the mustafa times cos that was really hilarious and thats what made me kinda attached to them x'((the pics are in random orders:
mr jeffrey mcclure & mr jason henderson] roamin ard lil india's provision stores, all these ppl.. whatever they can get their hands on goes to their noses. they are chefs so i guess smellin the stuffs becomes a habit..
me&blondie] here you go, my fav. blonde =DDD
masterpiece]
MR JEFFREY ANDERSON!!!!] he rocks man! he is like some kid alws wanderin ard but somehow he is alws able to WANDER back to join us. i said wander cos he'd alws look lost walkin back. he's a really really sweet and funny guy. we went to mustafa and he did an indian accent IN FRONT of the indian cashier, we were so scared the cashier'd kill us or sth and he started sufferin from 'claustrophobia'. hahaa! he also found this sign that warns the staff not to chuck empty cartons at the particular spot BUT at the same spot there was a rack for empty cartons -.- lets assume there was a typo. lets just say we just had SO much fun at mustafa. hahaa! OH! and the way he flags cab. OMG! he sure is desperate to get one. hahaa!
mr jesus lobo & mr ken jenner] i think mr jenner's cute! hahaa! and he is uber nice as well, i was talkin to him abt how the neighbourhoods in singapore are like and how we think an one hour journey's considered terrible for locals here. lol.
they were supposed to cook satay sauce at the TCA that day and i was their 'sous chef' it was so fun workin with him and mr suman roy. mr roy looked damn pro, well he is a big-time chef anyhow and cos he is indian he is kinda gd with it =DD anw like i was sayin.. mr jenner's so nice he was tastin the sauce and he made me try it also and it was so nice cos he actually trusted me to try it whn he is somewhat a chef himself xDDD
mr jeff anderson & mrs jean lee] mrs lee was one of those in lil india and she is sucha nice lady, i totally enjoyed myself tellin her all the trivias that i knew abt the indian culture in singapore..
mr suman roy] he rocks! he is super loud and funny! he's a really gd chef cos he is an indian so he is in touch with the spices and he is currently located in canada so he kinda has the best of both world? he is totally fun! like some pimp. hahaa!
mrs deborah grossman] she is really like the old auntie but the v sweet kind. at first i thot she was like kinda unfriendly but it turned out that twas cos she is kinda hard of hearin so if she cant hear me, she definitely cant react to me. hahaha! she was so sweet, i really cant find another word for it.. she was part of the lil india grp and she was one of the first to rmb my name. niceee! she totally loved souvenirs and she managed to get a few nice souvenirs for her son-in-law and herself.
prize presentation]
gutou & mr christopher ivens-brown] doesnt she just look traumatised? hahaa!
potato, mr brown & me!] he is super nice, he is like the mood-maker and like playboy-like. blondie's his scandal. hahaa!
mr jose sainz] IF i didnt get his name wrong. he is the v obvious mexican cos of his accent but he is not that difficult to understand so i guess it is ok =))
mr jason henderson] he sure is one stubborn person, thats what makes him unbearable but we kinda think he is cute. hahaa! i guess he is just too determined and persistent, v one-sided. other than that he is ok!
mr richard vernon aka mr noodles & mr paul carr (i think?)] mr noodles' permanent sous chef is like gutou. hahaa! dont they just match? lol. he is a sweet guy as in v soft-spoken, gentle and well-mannered. like he'd be quiet, i dont even think he socialises much. v kept-back and evn whn he speaks to us, he is SOFT! and he says thank-you in a soft voice as well.. how demure's that? =)))
mr jeff AGAIN! =DD] yes, he gave us a hug before they left ras. saddenin! =(((
blondie] i didnt knoe what was she doin and i was thinkin whn has she become a stick -face-to-face-camwhore. it was only after i took the pic that i realised she was posin like this..
gerri] this is gerri and she reminds me of zee, she is v sweet and funny as well. the only incident i rmb of her was whn we were bitchin abt this irritatin biatch! hahaa!
ms michelle moran] she is super friendly to us, esp potato!
sous chef & chef] this is potato and her chef ms moran!
Labels: delegates, tasty singapore
12:02 AM
Sunday, June 15, 2008
practice
boku wa, netsu to shikki o, hontou suki ja nai!
dakara zettai iraira suru
ima shuui no shikki, hyaku-ju paasento no you na.
afureru zannen maru ichinichi gakkari shita
ippou dewa ki onetchuu shite iru de,
mou ippou dewa minna to zenbu ni unzarisuru da.
i'm just tryin to prac so evn if you think my grammatical structure's screwed, let it alone
dakara zettai iraira suru
ima shuui no shikki, hyaku-ju paasento no you na.
afureru zannen maru ichinichi gakkari shita
ippou dewa ki onetchuu shite iru de,
mou ippou dewa minna to zenbu ni unzarisuru da.
i'm just tryin to prac so evn if you think my grammatical structure's screwed, let it alone
Labels: prac
2:37 AM
Saturday, June 14, 2008
when they say read between the lines, mayb they really meant it..
playground
smile
curves
lines
teeth
stain
forced contentment
hair
black
grey
hands
open
barricade
hidden
shiro tshiatsu
crumble
believe not
motivated not
ekubo daisuki desu
smile
curves
lines
teeth
stain
forced contentment
hair
black
grey
hands
open
barricade
hidden
shiro tshiatsu
crumble
believe not
motivated not
ekubo daisuki desu
Labels: mental game
10:29 PM
when you decide to be stupid, this is what happens
Mash Game: Predict Your Future at eSPIN-the-Bottle | |||
 | I will marry Nishikido Ryo. | ||
  | After a wild honeymoon, We will settle down in Osaka in our fabulous Apartment. | ||
 | We will have 9 kid(s) together. | ||
  | Our family will zoom around in a white Sports. | ||
 | I will spend my days as a Housewife, and live happily ever after. | ||
 | |||
1:00 AM
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
THE performance
with a lil fangirl-ing on some gayness. anw they held hands at one point cos the lyrics goes, 'do not let go of my hand'
Labels: misetekure, rock
5:11 AM
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
so.. what's your take on smokin?
met up with one of my friend for a short while recently.. yes, amidst my crazy proj schedule, and now i am takin up another job, tell me abt it. anw, yes, us bein us we decided to stay cooped in some cafe and chill. alot of topics came up within that short 3hours. it's definitely been some time since we last met up and lots of catchin up's definitely inevitable. i simply couldnt stop bein amazed at how much we've she's grown, in no time, we will be enterin the society.
somehow we got to the topic of smokin. yesyes, that babe knoes what i do and dont. so we started discussin abt why ppl smoke these days. of cos i am not gon scream SMOKIN IS BAD! neither do i think it is good. i just think too much of anythg is bad. with that i dont mean anybod shud attempt drug. hahaa! comin to think of it, i think half of my friends smoke and it is definitely sad that one or two of them smoke cos they think it is cool and they totally dont enjoy doin it, so why bother?
of cos, i have friends who succumb to stress and end up lightin up. and these ppl are usually the ones who totally give me a shock cos i alws end up catchin them in the act and i dont knoe why it kinda hurts sometimes cos i alws think, why cudnt they've just told me man..
i think smokin is ok, it is a gd way to destress and i am totally used to ppl smokin whn they are stressed in their work and tryin to work sth out lightin a stick but on norm days it shudnt be the case. hoho. i think social are definitely fine too. i dont believe in what the tp jerome said, that he doesnt believe in social cos they are fakers. err.. no, socials are no fakers :)) they are ppl who do not get addicted but still enjoy what they are doin, thats the main thg isnt it? i think all the smokers that i knoe are mainly from cj. hahaha! great school culture yeah? hoho.
of cos there are many who are quittin, hooray! or mayb just 'demotin' from reg to social. hahaa! thats good enough i think. scooby said sth damn true, for those who smoke cos it's cool, may they shudnt cos with so many smokers these days, it is those who dont smoke who are cooler.
ok, i dont knoe what i am blabberin abt. hehee! all i think that it is ok to smoke but not do it cos 'hey! it's cool!' -.-
somehow we got to the topic of smokin. yesyes, that babe knoes what i do and dont. so we started discussin abt why ppl smoke these days. of cos i am not gon scream SMOKIN IS BAD! neither do i think it is good. i just think too much of anythg is bad. with that i dont mean anybod shud attempt drug. hahaa! comin to think of it, i think half of my friends smoke and it is definitely sad that one or two of them smoke cos they think it is cool and they totally dont enjoy doin it, so why bother?
of cos, i have friends who succumb to stress and end up lightin up. and these ppl are usually the ones who totally give me a shock cos i alws end up catchin them in the act and i dont knoe why it kinda hurts sometimes cos i alws think, why cudnt they've just told me man..
i think smokin is ok, it is a gd way to destress and i am totally used to ppl smokin whn they are stressed in their work and tryin to work sth out lightin a stick but on norm days it shudnt be the case. hoho. i think social are definitely fine too. i dont believe in what the tp jerome said, that he doesnt believe in social cos they are fakers. err.. no, socials are no fakers :)) they are ppl who do not get addicted but still enjoy what they are doin, thats the main thg isnt it? i think all the smokers that i knoe are mainly from cj. hahaha! great school culture yeah? hoho.
of cos there are many who are quittin, hooray! or mayb just 'demotin' from reg to social. hahaa! thats good enough i think. scooby said sth damn true, for those who smoke cos it's cool, may they shudnt cos with so many smokers these days, it is those who dont smoke who are cooler.
ok, i dont knoe what i am blabberin abt. hehee! all i think that it is ok to smoke but not do it cos 'hey! it's cool!' -.-
Labels: smoking
9:08 PM
i am willing to try but what about you?
instead of frettin over the Sichuan earthquake or the unfortunate event in Myanmar (sorry, i am not too clear abt this), whr all we can do is donate our clothes, daily necessities and money. mayb we shud just look ahead and see our biggest prob, the ailin earth. i kinda knew Singapore kinda has this save Gaia campaign goin on but if you ask me i'd say the effort is weak. is this like some worldwide event thing? cos seriously, or shud i say ironincally, i am hearin or seein the efforts of this 'save-the-earth' of sorts event, from Japanese media; Touch! Eco 2008. i still do keep my tv on with the local progs alright the Japanese are doin lots like this within the eco week which i assume is from 2june to 8june. the celebrities took up different challenges by carryin acts that were eco-friendly if i'm not wrong and one of them was to educate the africans or sth.. here's one of them. it is a clip showin the performance of the song fuka-fuka love the earth which translates into let's love the earth gently. it is a song co-written by all 7 of them in the band and the lightin of the performance was actually generated by the celebrities cyclin their asses off below the stage.
but i gotta admit the adverts that Singapore has come up with feels real and movin. i guess it is one of the rare adverts that deserves praises. basically the Gaia from our Save Gaia campaign comes from this..
The Gaia hypothesis is an ecological hypothesis that proposes that the biosphere and the physical components of the Earth (atmosphere , cryosphere, hydrosphere and lithosphere) are coupled together to form a complex interacting system. This system is proposed to act in a homeostatic fashion that preserves climatic and biogeochemical conditions on Earth that are suitable for living organisms. Named after the Greek Titan of the earth, the hypothesis is frequently described as viewing the Earth as a single organism. (from Wiki)
so now i finally see the reason behind the govt's effort in tryin to motivate ppl to save on the electricity and the vigorous campaigns on savin electricity and the use of canvas bags instead of plastic bags. i guess it is workin? cos it is subtle and it slowly becomes part of us, a habitual thg..
after all that bullshit, seriously i think i am your most eco-unfriendly person but i sure dont fancy carryin plastic bags ard unless necessary. so does that make me more eco-friendly now? i am not bein pro-Japanese here but it is still nice seein the efforts they are puttin it to create an awareness. some part of me dont really care if it is from the bottom of their hearts that they care for the earth or simply doin it for publicity cos it is heartenin seein ppl evn tryin. mayb, just mayb, from today, i can just do a small part. i was once that selfish to think that i need not cos i wont live to see the earth deteriorates but now, i might just wanna consider how i cant do my part (less hairspray anybod? hahaa!).
just a tiny question... why is environmentally-friendly shortened to eco-friendly?
i was supposed to blog abt my ssm proficiency test and my drama review on Last Friends but well, i guess this needed more attention so those two just gotta wait..
but i gotta admit the adverts that Singapore has come up with feels real and movin. i guess it is one of the rare adverts that deserves praises. basically the Gaia from our Save Gaia campaign comes from this..
The Gaia hypothesis is an ecological hypothesis that proposes that the biosphere and the physical components of the Earth (atmosphere , cryosphere, hydrosphere and lithosphere) are coupled together to form a complex interacting system. This system is proposed to act in a homeostatic fashion that preserves climatic and biogeochemical conditions on Earth that are suitable for living organisms. Named after the Greek Titan of the earth, the hypothesis is frequently described as viewing the Earth as a single organism. (from Wiki)
so now i finally see the reason behind the govt's effort in tryin to motivate ppl to save on the electricity and the vigorous campaigns on savin electricity and the use of canvas bags instead of plastic bags. i guess it is workin? cos it is subtle and it slowly becomes part of us, a habitual thg..
after all that bullshit, seriously i think i am your most eco-unfriendly person but i sure dont fancy carryin plastic bags ard unless necessary. so does that make me more eco-friendly now? i am not bein pro-Japanese here but it is still nice seein the efforts they are puttin it to create an awareness. some part of me dont really care if it is from the bottom of their hearts that they care for the earth or simply doin it for publicity cos it is heartenin seein ppl evn tryin. mayb, just mayb, from today, i can just do a small part. i was once that selfish to think that i need not cos i wont live to see the earth deteriorates but now, i might just wanna consider how i cant do my part (less hairspray anybod? hahaa!).
i was supposed to blog abt my ssm proficiency test and my drama review on Last Friends but well, i guess this needed more attention so those two just gotta wait..
Labels: eco week 2008, save Gaia
4:32 AM
Wednesday, June 04, 2008
compilation
Last Friends: (ep.4)
boku wa.. itsumo.. kino(kimi no) matte.. matsu matsu.. akunai da..
hitoribocchitte yuna, minna sou dayo
Kanjani 8: (Itsuta Mata)
dakishimete hoshii yoru boku datte tsuyokunai kara
kizutsuku koto saw osoreteta
kinou niwa mou, modoranaiyo
tsuyoku nara kara
What you looking for flyin into the sky
All you gotta do is believe
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First completed the movie Crows Zero, basically it is your action flick; a high school based. Fine, I gotta admit that I am totally addicted to Jap production, storyline and what have you. So much so that I am havin probs tryin to appreciate western movies. It is either that or no movies are up to standards for my likin so far.
boku wa.. itsumo.. kino(kimi no) matte.. matsu matsu.. akunai da..
hitoribocchitte yuna, minna sou dayo
Kanjani 8: (Itsuta Mata)
dakishimete hoshii yoru boku datte tsuyokunai kara
kizutsuku koto saw osoreteta
kinou niwa mou, modoranaiyo
tsuyoku nara kara
What you looking for flyin into the sky
All you gotta do is believe
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
First completed the movie Crows Zero, basically it is your action flick; a high school based. Fine, I gotta admit that I am totally addicted to Jap production, storyline and what have you. So much so that I am havin probs tryin to appreciate western movies. It is either that or no movies are up to standards for my likin so far.
Basically czero is abt this high school whr all the boys fight to rule the school. Fight as in literal brutal force. It got me thinking, if I were to be in a school like that, in a fight like that, how would I fight? Honestly, there is not hundred percent guarantee but considerin the fact that I think I do crazy thgs under the influence of this chemical called adrenaline, I’d hate to imagine. I guess I’d go crazy, like total wild whackfest. The more pain I get from the injuries I sustain in the fight (it is inevitable in a fight isit? We are no manga characters), the harder my punches will be and I’d totally make sure the ppl I hit suffer, sick I knoe. I can totally see myself losin all senses.. mayb I’d be less destructive whn I am younger, I rmb wrestling with my older cuz. Back then twas still the blind punches but now I’d prolly really make sure my punches hit home. Of cos all these are just hypothetic, cos I think my kicks are pretty weak in reality, esp my left leg but I cant my right shud do some decent damage with all that muscles. Hahaha!
Still, I kinda envy the feel in the whole movie. I mean your normal girls might just go, “I cant understand what they are fightin for?!” but I’d say they are fightin for a very noble cause. It is appropriate cos they are still young, they are carryin the hopes of their comrades and many other ppl whn they fight. It is not just your childish lets fight cos you stared at me, WTF?! It has a purpose, on the shoulders of the ‘men’ (tho they are only say, 18?) are the dreams of many others. It may be a burden but it is also a very strong drivin force. The closest I can think of in real life is team sports. As a capt, you carry with you the responsibilities, the dream, hope and the trust your team mates entrust upon you. You not only mark you own opponent, you make sure your team mates are copin, you rush up to take knocks for them (who says ppl play clean sports), alws be the first to save balls from getting beyond the court if twas in your possession. The whole chemistry of a TEAM. I cant say we lay our lives dwn for each other but our bodies at least. The injuries sustained, the fall, the blood, the scars are all evidence of our sacrifices. Many of these stay with us till we lay six feet under but they are sweet sacrifices, for the memories are not sth anyone can rob you of.
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dont do it, pls dont.. you knoe i wont voice it out. i wont say anythg cos i dont knoe how to put them into words and it just isnt me. i dont believe in forcin thgs of this aspect. forget abt the 'accomodatin', 'adjustin' or 'adaptin'. tried, tested and failed. i am anal, i only want the best. mayb thats why the previous ones have failed thus far..
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i dont knoe if my temper has improved or many thgs doesnt matter anymore.. i'd rather be left alone than to suit others. whn i dont flare, it doesnt mean i am fine with it, i just cannot be bothered to make thgs more troublesome.
mayb there is a reason why my counsellors have alws pointed out that i am too sarcastic and arrogant. i mean at least i am myself in front of them but the comments that return really arent too nice.. sometimes i just dont feel like bein too nice, more often than not, the result of bein nice is just bein taken for granted. it really isnt worth it, is it? if thats the case, i'd rather be feared and unapproachable..
Labels: many many thots
12:09 AM
Sunday, June 01, 2008
because evrybod's more interested in the cacoon than the caterpillar
Cold Storage Kids' Run:
camwhorin on the way to esplanade:
i am REALLY short! i had to tiptoe for all the pics or kster had to bend dwn. the difference is more than prominent in pic 4&5!
some artistic shots:
met up with b. hahaha! that badmood girl treated us to prawn mee and today i was the messy-eater =X sorrysorry. hehee! and i was beyond high, for some known reason and i cudnt stop laughin. i laugh so hard i was totally wobbly. hahaa! and b bein in her badmood, twas.. err.. b, sometimes bein at your hse whn you badmood's really bad. today, lucky i wasnt alone if not really sian. hahaa!
Labels: artistic, camwhore, classic alvinkang in good mood, kids' run
10:42 PM
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
today
stupid acctg tutorial:
the man:
the view:
KiKi:
the man:
the view:
KiKi:
Labels: all in a day's work
2:32 AM
lovelove♥
♥KOR'S♥ 21st BIRTHDAY: (BLACK&GOLD)
VENUE: Mount Faber
THE PEOPLE:
♥LOWELL'S♥ 20th BIRTHDAY:
PART OF BERLIN:
♥ADEL'♥ 19th BIRTHDAY:
VENUE:
PLAN: KIDNAP
OUTCOME: BIG SUCCESS withsmall blunders
HELPER: THE 'AHMAD'
BRILLIANT MASTERMINDS: P&B
VENUE: Mount Faber
THE PEOPLE:
♥LOWELL'S♥ 20th BIRTHDAY:
PART OF BERLIN:
♥ADEL'♥ 19th BIRTHDAY:
VENUE:
PLAN: KIDNAP
OUTCOME: BIG SUCCESS with
HELPER: THE 'AHMAD'
BRILLIANT MASTERMINDS: P&B
Labels: birthdays within 2 days
12:56 AM
Monday, May 26, 2008
the forgotten
i think i'm seriously startin to forget how to blog. i kinda went on a hiatus cos i am on an all time low and i really dont fancy rantin at ppl on my blog, cos i'l be evn nastier not that i am all nice and sweet now. hehee!i've been eatin too much sweet stuffs lately! serious! and i think i am puttin on weight again! yabai! damn sian la! and i've alr got at least TWO ppl commentin on my fats, ok, enough ar. later i flare. hahaha! and fry yall with my pork oil. hahaha! i am like tryin to eat to fill up the feel of emptiness but not workin, it is backfirin! hahaha! -.-
i knoe i am supposed to upload many pics but lazy and i am SUPPOSED to be studyin for my damn geog travel test now! -.- tell me abt panickin. i am panicky but i am not doin anythg. how motivatin ya? just after png said i look damn hardworkin this sem, i am SO takin that as a praise and correctin him that last sem i WAS too! hahaa! mayb it is the havin a goal in mind thg, i have another 2yrs and many thgs hafta change in this 2yrs, manymany thgs..
i lost sth after i entered tp. now, i am facin the same decision.. to let go or to go for it.. it is alws easier to let go and take a step back but i am really wonderin if it is the right thg to do.. moreover, i cant be too pushy as well, i think it is damn irritatin. ugh~!
i hafta let this subside again. friendship can be a double-edged sword and cos of it, i alws hafta sacrifice this just for the friendship. either way it is not any less painful.. and this is the 4th time but well, i alws think it means sth... it does.. right?
Labels: emptiness, forgotten, goal, sacrifice
11:38 PM
Monday, May 19, 2008
zZzzz
shall insist on updatin tho i am totally gon ko soon.. this sucks cos i am killin myself slowly.. i had wanted to mention sth but i seem to have lost my train of thots..
OH! yes yes YES! i miss my old hair! my brown and very straight hair! my hair isnt naturally straight, i have natural curls thanks to both my mom and darddy =(( but they gave me the soft fluffy hair which is dyin from all the ssm sprays and what not -.- i wanna have my hair brown and soft-rebonded again!
yes, doesnt my hair rock in those pics?! =(((( and i was obviously tanner then. shud i just go get myself blackblack? hahaa! it's a SUPER impt decision cos my tan lasts forever. hahaa! i just got strong pigmentation if thats what you call it. hehee! UGHH! I HATE MY HAIR NOW!
fav! ♥
met up with b today, wondered ard town aimlessly and bought some random mag. helped yin-ying get her arashi mags too, why not? since today's the last day of kino's 20% sale for members =DD then b's mommy joined up. yes, three of us, what a weird combi but twas alright. i felt really bad cos evrytime we meet up to eat, it'd alws end up bein auntie treatin me and b wouldnt let me pay for the drinks too.. but the topshop blunder was FUNNY! i'd think b was the one who made the mistake. hahaa! cos she alws semi-deaf. hahaa! and yeahyeah, thanks for tryin to help me face up to 'the shop' one day i will have enough courage to look in but not now. hahaa!
rabu-rabu! ♥
OH! yes yes YES! i miss my old hair! my brown and very straight hair! my hair isnt naturally straight, i have natural curls thanks to both my mom and darddy =(( but they gave me the soft fluffy hair which is dyin from all the ssm sprays and what not -.- i wanna have my hair brown and soft-rebonded again!
yes, doesnt my hair rock in those pics?! =(((( and i was obviously tanner then. shud i just go get myself blackblack? hahaa! it's a SUPER impt decision cos my tan lasts forever. hahaa! i just got strong pigmentation if thats what you call it. hehee! UGHH! I HATE MY HAIR NOW!
fav! ♥
met up with b today, wondered ard town aimlessly and bought some random mag. helped yin-ying get her arashi mags too, why not? since today's the last day of kino's 20% sale for members =DD then b's mommy joined up. yes, three of us, what a weird combi but twas alright. i felt really bad cos evrytime we meet up to eat, it'd alws end up bein auntie treatin me and b wouldnt let me pay for the drinks too.. but the topshop blunder was FUNNY! i'd think b was the one who made the mistake. hahaa! cos she alws semi-deaf. hahaa! and yeahyeah, thanks for tryin to help me face up to 'the shop' one day i will have enough courage to look in but not now. hahaa!
rabu-rabu! ♥
Labels: b, b's mommy, old hair, rabu-rabu, straight and brown hair
3:40 AM
Saturday, May 17, 2008
to this day, i'm still immature
it is time like this that i realise that i am still but a kid incapable of accomplishin anythg by myself. it is times whn i make irrational decisions, choosin to be wilful and not considerin abt more impt thgs. it is times like this whn i feel like i cant handle my own emotions and end up hurtin myself that i feel like a kid.
still another one mth plus and the demon inside can be released, just that one mth plus more and i can just become me again.
i am totally losin patience with evrythg, evn with my dramas, i am totally skippin scenes just so that i can finish them faster, thgs aint lookin too bright in this case.
i realised i no longer speak with buffers. in the first place, do i even knoe what is buffers? i am SO straighforward, it is like automatic. whn i speak i am just simply blunt, words doesnt get processed in my brain, they just come out in a verbal regurgitation. ok, i DO feel bad if i hurt ppl in the process but close folks shud have gotten used to it, hafnt they? i'd love to have them be this straightforward with me, so i see no point in me actin all nice and dainty. i am me btw -.- but i will still try to kick the habit. tho i totally love dokkun, i dont needa become a docchan. hahaa! i'm gettin lame..
i didnt do the freakin trans and i've alr tried my best to not make it sound as broken, at the same time tryin to keep the meanin of the damn song..
Struggling
A day passed by
Screaming
A day passed by
Resisting
A day passed by
Shattering
A day passed by
To some extent if you understand,
How about wisening up a lil
Even though tempted by lowly others,
I will not get angry and make more enemies
I am like this because I am fearfully and restlessly searching for kind people
Do I have ambitions? Am I just? Do I have feelings? Do I have shame?
Unfortunately to this day, I'm still not a mature person. I'm still immature
Unfortunately to this day, I'm still not a mature person. I'm still immature
Overstraining
A day passed by
Agitated
A day passed by
Stubbornly
A day passed
Shattering
A day passed
Let me teach you how to lead
Even though tempted by lowly others
I would not get angry and vanish
I am like that because I am fearfully and restlessly searching for kind people
Do I have ambitions? Am I just? Do I have feelings? Do I have shame?
Unfortunately to this day, I'm still not a mature person. I'm still immature
Unfortunately to this day, I'm still not a mature person. I'm still immature
I am this rebellious because I am fearfully and restlessly searching for kind people
Do I have ambitions? Am I just? Do I have feelings? Do I have shame?
Unfortunately to this day, I'm still not a mature person. I'm still immature
Unfortunately to this day, I'm still not a mature person. I'm still immature
Unfortunately to this day, I'm still not a mature person. I'm still immature
Unfortunately to this day, I'm still not a mature person. I'm still immature
Labels: blunt, docchan, freedom, immature, impatience
1:25 AM
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
combo
it is not difficult to find pics of female and a kid but to see pics of boys and kid is just PURE sweeeeetness! i love the feel of it. i fell in love with the first pic, it is actually one with pi and a kid, both smilin so innocently, this pic totally melted me at first sight. to prove that i just simply like the theme and not only cos it is pi (who wouldnt, pi is TOO pretty to resist). the second pic is another of a father, i assume, the baby looks so happy to be slpin on his chest (makes me want to too =X) dies of the sweeeetness seriously!
yes, i think she is DAMN hot, i love her style and her look. this is one lady who isnt your lets all be demure style and i love her attitude, not over but just being herself. it sure is nice bein here then..
oh, anw she is ueto aya =DD
lets all get hyped up listenin to upbeat songs and enjoy life =DDDDDD
------------------------------ end ------------------------------
it is this feelin, the feelin of youth slowly slippin away, out of my grasp. it sure doesnt feel gd seein your own cuz havin their own careers whn they are not very much older than you are. it is moments like these that make me feel that we are no longer the same, no longer the same teenagers yrs ago.. to think i thot the transition from a kid to teen was bad, this is worse.. we dont have the leisure to be wilful anymore, we have to learn to be independent and face the harsh reality (notice how i alws call it harsh reality instead of only reality). but here, i am still happily wastin my remainin youth away.
mayb i shud start wakin up from my dreams and stop believin that i can behave like a kid just by hangin out with my younger friends, they still have the privilege.. but not me.. in another two yrs, i will and shud be on my own alr, and what will i do then? it sure doesnt help that i still look like a kid at my age, it is brainwashin evrybod into thinkin i'm still a kid. thgs are shud be gettin serious and here i am enjoyin this freedom of chillin as and whn i feel wilful enough to.
i need to learn to be more disciplined and start understandin what it means to dress to impress almost 24/7. honestly, i cant imagine livin my life like this. i need to keep pushin myself to work harder.. i dont want to live a mediocre life, no way..
i am so proud of berlin wall, how evrybod's so forgivin, mayb except ME! =DD but we alws knew that we'd stayed this close for so long because evrybod took turn to keep the grp tgd. it's partner dearest this time and i firmly believe that she'l come back, she is tryin. it sure isnt easy tryin whn you're out of the invisible 'circle'. it is not easy bein the only one out of the 'grp' but if i can find my way back, i have faith partner will too :)) and this time it is up to me to believe in her. afterall, nobod'd knoe as well as i do how it really feels like.. tryin but not knoe how to at the same time.. so partner, trust me, it'l take time but not impossible!! ♥
the sun's been comfy these few days, it is the feelin of warmth, perfect!
ran into another old acquaintance and seein evrybod holdin a permanent job; do i envy them or sympathise with them..?
yes, i think she is DAMN hot, i love her style and her look. this is one lady who isnt your lets all be demure style and i love her attitude, not over but just being herself. it sure is nice bein here then..
oh, anw she is ueto aya =DD
lets all get hyped up listenin to upbeat songs and enjoy life =DDDDDD
------------------------------ end ------------------------------
it is this feelin, the feelin of youth slowly slippin away, out of my grasp. it sure doesnt feel gd seein your own cuz havin their own careers whn they are not very much older than you are. it is moments like these that make me feel that we are no longer the same, no longer the same teenagers yrs ago.. to think i thot the transition from a kid to teen was bad, this is worse.. we dont have the leisure to be wilful anymore, we have to learn to be independent and face the harsh reality (notice how i alws call it harsh reality instead of only reality). but here, i am still happily wastin my remainin youth away.
mayb i shud start wakin up from my dreams and stop believin that i can behave like a kid just by hangin out with my younger friends, they still have the privilege.. but not me.. in another two yrs, i will and shud be on my own alr, and what will i do then? it sure doesnt help that i still look like a kid at my age, it is brainwashin evrybod into thinkin i'm still a kid. thgs are shud be gettin serious and here i am enjoyin this freedom of chillin as and whn i feel wilful enough to.
i need to learn to be more disciplined and start understandin what it means to dress to impress almost 24/7. honestly, i cant imagine livin my life like this. i need to keep pushin myself to work harder.. i dont want to live a mediocre life, no way..
i am so proud of berlin wall, how evrybod's so forgivin, mayb except ME! =DD but we alws knew that we'd stayed this close for so long because evrybod took turn to keep the grp tgd. it's partner dearest this time and i firmly believe that she'l come back, she is tryin. it sure isnt easy tryin whn you're out of the invisible 'circle'. it is not easy bein the only one out of the 'grp' but if i can find my way back, i have faith partner will too :)) and this time it is up to me to believe in her. afterall, nobod'd knoe as well as i do how it really feels like.. tryin but not knoe how to at the same time.. so partner, trust me, it'l take time but not impossible!! ♥
the sun's been comfy these few days, it is the feelin of warmth, perfect!
ran into another old acquaintance and seein evrybod holdin a permanent job; do i envy them or sympathise with them..?
Labels: aya, baby, enjoy life, excepts, grow up, man, pi
7:50 PM
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
ohhishashiburi
love this pic♥:
f21's fittin room:
zara's fitting room:
at sakae:
din's bday:
adel's drivin:
after cedar youth alumni gatherin, at cartel [berlin]:
on dick's car (she was DRIVIN, mind you..):
f21's fittin room:
zara's fitting room:
at sakae:
din's bday:
adel's drivin:
after cedar youth alumni gatherin, at cartel [berlin]:
on dick's car (she was DRIVIN, mind you..):
Labels: OHHISHASHIBURI, pic spam
12:56 AM
Sunday, May 11, 2008
whn feelin overflow
i am still too lazy to blog today plus tmr there's ssm, lets postpone evrythg then.. shall blog abt cedar youth alumni gatherin, din's bday and.. i forgot but just many stuffs so it'l be a loooong entry with lots reflection so dont read if you aint interested, save all of us the trouble =DD
Labels: preview
9:25 PM
Friday, May 09, 2008
word game
yes, it is time for the usual 'random' words
- pms
- badmood
- extreme moodswing
- no pics
- exhaustion
- mutual
- frustration
- fail to understand
- make-up
- top of the world
- alone
- peak
- rewatch
- glow
- genki
- it's my soul
Labels: random word game
12:12 AM
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
random.
the only pics for the day:we went town and managed to get what we wanted. shiokshiok!
i keep forgettin thgs i wanna say recently, it is so bad! horrible! i am just kinda high now, mayb it is the lack of food man.. i met dicks today!!! OMG! I WAS SO HAPPY!! i totally missed her and i didnt expect to see her there. stupid rich kid! hahaa! and her hot GREEN cardigan was the BOMB! i saw it and i immediately knew why she bought it! we fangirl-ed awhile and i had to leave, gosh! i miss the girl! hot green cardigan! i totally wanna die there. hahaa!
10:23 PM
Tuesday, May 06, 2008
about being alone... everyone is.
gosh, those were supposed to be comfortin words in the drama i was intendin to watch. alright, it first debuted four wks ago and i still dont have the courage to watch it. i have to keep remindin myself mentally to avoid that drama or i'd crash!
it's abt lesbianism, gayism, abuse, .. alright, basically evrythg bad. thus, i am waitin to watch it only whn the season ends, which'd definitely mean a motivatin endin. i'd really love to see how the scriptwriter rounds evrythg up.
alright, nxt up, super ugly pics =D well, who cares abt looks whn you have love (from yfriends!)
yes, they acc-ed me to ps to pick up my spree stuff and we had our dinner there. finally managed to get my mother's day present! i got my mom a zen! mp4, something i didnt evn get myself and since it is within budget i bought it there and then. after that we did our shoppin at daiso! yes! my fav. place, i didnt just use jap products cos of the dramas but it's since some time ago.
brain's too fried to blog much tho i had wanted to type chunks. love.
it's abt lesbianism, gayism, abuse, .. alright, basically evrythg bad. thus, i am waitin to watch it only whn the season ends, which'd definitely mean a motivatin endin. i'd really love to see how the scriptwriter rounds evrythg up.
alright, nxt up, super ugly pics =D well, who cares abt looks whn you have love (from yfriends!)
yes, they acc-ed me to ps to pick up my spree stuff and we had our dinner there. finally managed to get my mother's day present! i got my mom a zen! mp4, something i didnt evn get myself and since it is within budget i bought it there and then. after that we did our shoppin at daiso! yes! my fav. place, i didnt just use jap products cos of the dramas but it's since some time ago.
brain's too fried to blog much tho i had wanted to type chunks. love.
Labels: mother's day, ps, shoppin
10:49 PM
Sunday, May 04, 2008
day(s) out
lets start with today's. we were supposed to go out with adel but she didnt reply my msg ytd (mayb twas her sis' bday that worn her out). so somehow or rather me and b went to 'crash' kster and joel's date. i swear they are the CUTEST 'couple' ever. hahaa! we were like 'double-datin'; me and b, kster and joel. hahaa! it turns out that kster bein weird has nth to do with the ppl he hangs out with cos joel's totally normal like us! hahaa!
oh oh! anw i gotta say kster was SUPER nice (the word 'super' is not enough to describe how nice he was) today and it is cos of joel -.- what a pig right?! but twas not so awkward today cos it seems like joel totally knoes what goes on between kster, b and i. so that got me thinkin.. just what do they talk abt whn they get tgd man..
kk, i'l leave the rest to the pics.. (i am still lackin lovey-dovey pics of the boys cos of b!!! feel guilty k? hahaa!)
can you feel the love? hahaa! they looks so prischboy-ish! damn cute. hahaa! and of cos some gay actions 'upon request', tho i somewhat suspect that kster just wanna do it deep dwn xP
we took alot more pics but cos it is with b, this is the only one i have..
it is totally difficult tryin to take individual pics with the boys! we had to coax and coo them like babies, twas uber funny! you'l get what i mean whn you see the joel and b pics. hahaa!
joel looks so SO kiddish. hehee!
alright, i met up with scooby and naddie ytd tgd with dinny. doggie was bein a bitch as usual, talkin NON-STOP whn evrybod at the table were stonin but yep, we had fun, esp that dog. he was a TOTAL idiot with toto and 4D that all three of us nearly killed ourselves tryin to explain it to him! since i didnt have the time to upload ALL the vids, make do with these pics first..
i met up with the grpies some time ago. the name grpies came abt in the WEIRDEST fashion, twas durin our 2.4. yes, the napfa 2.4k time. well these are the pics that day, definitely not our best record. i rmb back in j1 days, we set the record of 70plus pics in a min, that is abt 60s and that'd mean more that 1pic/s. i'd sure think we clicked the cam non-stop, blondie did the snappin. i sure miss camwhorin with her durin lessons.. and mind you, we were sittin in the FIRST row, right in the tchr's face. hahaa!
well, anw blondie's the one without specs, joyce. the name came abt cos she has natural gold hair, like seriously. whats more, she really amazes you with her brain. for example at ajisen, we were supposed to fill up the feedback form. i'd sure hope yall do knoe we usually TICK the circles? that sweetheart went to shade, so me and sze was like.. "JOYCE! WHAT ARE YOU DOIN!?" hahaa! and that babe had absolutely NO idea what we were talkin abt -.-
oh oh! anw i gotta say kster was SUPER nice (the word 'super' is not enough to describe how nice he was) today and it is cos of joel -.- what a pig right?! but twas not so awkward today cos it seems like joel totally knoes what goes on between kster, b and i. so that got me thinkin.. just what do they talk abt whn they get tgd man..
kk, i'l leave the rest to the pics.. (i am still lackin lovey-dovey pics of the boys cos of b!!! feel guilty k? hahaa!)
can you feel the love? hahaa! they looks so prischboy-ish! damn cute. hahaa! and of cos some gay actions 'upon request', tho i somewhat suspect that kster just wanna do it deep dwn xP
we took alot more pics but cos it is with b, this is the only one i have..
it is totally difficult tryin to take individual pics with the boys! we had to coax and coo them like babies, twas uber funny! you'l get what i mean whn you see the joel and b pics. hahaa!
joel looks so SO kiddish. hehee!
alright, i met up with scooby and naddie ytd tgd with dinny. doggie was bein a bitch as usual, talkin NON-STOP whn evrybod at the table were stonin but yep, we had fun, esp that dog. he was a TOTAL idiot with toto and 4D that all three of us nearly killed ourselves tryin to explain it to him! since i didnt have the time to upload ALL the vids, make do with these pics first..
i met up with the grpies some time ago. the name grpies came abt in the WEIRDEST fashion, twas durin our 2.4. yes, the napfa 2.4k time. well these are the pics that day, definitely not our best record. i rmb back in j1 days, we set the record of 70plus pics in a min, that is abt 60s and that'd mean more that 1pic/s. i'd sure think we clicked the cam non-stop, blondie did the snappin. i sure miss camwhorin with her durin lessons.. and mind you, we were sittin in the FIRST row, right in the tchr's face. hahaa!
well, anw blondie's the one without specs, joyce. the name came abt cos she has natural gold hair, like seriously. whats more, she really amazes you with her brain. for example at ajisen, we were supposed to fill up the feedback form. i'd sure hope yall do knoe we usually TICK the circles? that sweetheart went to shade, so me and sze was like.. "JOYCE! WHAT ARE YOU DOIN!?" hahaa! and that babe had absolutely NO idea what we were talkin abt -.-
Labels: day(s) out, fundom, love the ppl
10:10 PM
happy moments
the doggie that talks NON-STOPLabels: sheer
2:03 AM
in response to b's post
well, i totally get what you mean. our situation totally swopped ard. be grateful ok, at least you get to see almost all of o3, you get what i mean dont you? yes, i really miss many ppl, cant hide that i am kinda startin to like my new class but the thgs we went thru and crapped abt in o3 is totally different. i miss how we played angel-mortal, how we celebrated each other's birthday, esp that kster's whr we actually went all out, with only two of us and we kinda enjoyed it. gosh, i even miss kster in my class la! ok, some part of it is cos he'l carry my stuffs, tho he is nicer now, he actually doesnt complain and quite willin but it just feels different without the both of you, you see =((i even miss you being high, kster bein noisy and irritatin durin class time. i miss gevinpng's lesson too cos like i said, he isnt your norm goody-two-shoes tchr.. i am bein sucha idiot.. i didnt knoe that o3 grew on me unknowingly. i am alws complainin abt the ppl bein too weird.. more like complainin abt tp ppl on the whole but well, i am just glad we managed to bond durin the later part with all our nonsense.. i am finally tryin to appreciate their 'innocence'. hoho. b, you are losin it alr, you are not as clean anymore. hehee!
1:39 AM